Reality hits...

Yesterday was by far the hardest day of my life...we were discharged from the hospital, and our baby boy was left to stay...it's not something I can talk about...just yet... but your prayers and God's gentle reminder that this precious little boy is in His hands got me through the night...

Today is a new day and I spent it with my two favorite boys.

Many of you have inquired how Jackson is doing.  Most of the time I reply that he is doing ok.  Well in this blog, I will do my best to give you more of an update of his progress and share some of the things I'm learning from the NICU staff (which by the way are so incredible!)  So, here we go...a lot of this sounds really scary, but Nick and I are reminded that he is "acting his age" and all of this he is going through is expected for a 30 weeker.

Jackson has been having too many bradycardias-which are low heart rates.  His lower heart rate causes desaturations of the blood stream.  The NICU seems to use these terms interchangeably, "dsat" or "brady"  Bottom line-he stops breathing.  When this happens, the NICU team sees how Jackson will respond.  Sometimes he starts breathing on his own; sometimes the nurses need to assist him by rubbing his back.  Because he had too many brady's, they have given him a nasal cannula-a little tube that goes in his nostrils.  BUT the good news here is that he is still on room air, not oxygen.  This nasal cannula is just flowing air, like a breeze, in his nose to help him.  Since this, he hasn't had near as many brady's.  So we and the dr's are hopeful that he will not have to get oxygen support.

His feedings are going well.  He is receiving my breast milk through a feeding tube that goes in his nose.  Tonight he is going from 6 feedings a day to 8!  So hopefully he will pack on a few lb's!  There have been a few icky green residuals after feeding so they are monitoring that more closely.

His blood sugar levels were high a couple times.  A normal range would be over 45, under 100-110.  Jackson's was in the 190s-way too high.  But right before we left for the evening, his blood sugar was 88 which we were thrilled about!

They ran a CBC (complete blood count) on the little guy.  His white and red blood cells look completely normal.  YAY!  They sent off a lab sample to see if he has any kind of infection (because of the green residuals)...we should know the results in a couple days.  But after talking to our nurse practitioner for Jackson she did not realize I was on the Mag drip-she said that Jackson could still be getting over that which could be a cause for his digestive system/green residual situation.

There are a couple spots on his nose we aren't sure what they are.  They could be from delivery-he was sunny-side up.  Or it possibly could be a hemangioma.  We aren't sure yet.  Both of which are not concerning.

Jackson has high levels of bilirubin, so he is constantly under a blue light.  This is no fun for mommy or daddy because we can only hold him once a day because he needs to stay under the light.  Nick says it looks like he's under a bug zapper.  He has some pretty stylish shades.  But guess who got to hold him today?  HIS MOMMY!  The way I hold him is called the "kangaroo care".  They stuff little Jackson down my shirt, skin to skin.  It is by far my favorite part of the day.  It is such a special time that I get to bond with my baby.  When we can't get Jackson out, they encourage "hand containment", which is firm touches on his bottom and head.  This type of touch reminds him of being in the womb, all snuggly.

Although this is all so scary and overwhelming, we actually had a great day with him, laughing at his sweet and funny facial expressions, drooling like his daddy when he sleeps, his cry sounding like a sheep, the way he LOVES his paci, and watching him respond to us when we talk to him.

Thanks, Shannon, for the cupcakes!  

Grandma checking out her cutie-pie!

I love my family!

Mommy and Jackson kangaroo care time.

As always, thank you for your prayers and support.  We are forever grateful.